Letting Go Eases Pain

Discipling hundreds of young people for the past decade allowed me to experience how to be a teacher as well as a friend and dad.  It is true that a teacher is the second parent of the student.  True dedication in the teaching ministry allows you to move from the initial teaching of a particular subject to a much broader picture of molding lives.

I have been very fulfilled in touching lives of those I was able to minister.  Some are very very successful, though some are struggling.  You cannot really chart their life for they are the one who makes their decision in life.  The only thing we can do is really equip them and bring out the best in them.  Time is limited because they cannot be with you always.  The good thing is, when they are in distress and need, they always come to you and sought for your help.  Some are now even my kumpare and kumare.  Some even insisted that either their first child or their first male child be my godson or goddaughter.  It really felt fulfilling and blessed.

Since it has been like these with all of them, I cannot say that I am not attach to them emotionally since I really treat them as my spiritual children and wanting the best for each one of them.  Maybe, this is the reason why I am still single because I already have too many children around.  Great people usually do not have children because they already have enough around them.  Some a whole group of people, and for some a whole country.

The other side of this is when they commit mistakes, it breaks once heart.  Especially with this post modern generation who are treats everything as relative truth.  Because the youth in this generation are frequent offenders, I felt frustrated and affects me emotionally.  Now, it is more evident for me to feel how parents are frustrated with their kids because I myself gets frustrated with them.

With the recent learning experience, though I know it is my role to educate and remind them when they fall, it has affected me with frustrations and emotional instability, maybe because I have really treated them as my real children.  Well, they are not really my children, who cares?  Yah, I know God cares.  I should care.  But with their constant offense, knowing what they should not do, and kept on doing it.  I really felt bad and felt all time and effort for these past years have gone to waste.

The best solution I can think of is to let go.  They are old enough, I have done my share to love, care and educate.  I believe I have brought out the best in each one of them.  It is time for me to move on and touch other young people's life.  Their destiny lies in their own hands and head.  I cannot control their destiny, how they will live their life and what would be its end result will always be up to their doing.  By letting go, it eases the pain seeing them do foolish stuffs in life.  Maybe that is part of their learning experience.  Now, I even understand more how God has been frustrated with me.

I have done my share well, I suppose.  The recent incident has caused me one sleepless night of sadness and frustration, I wanted to shout and scold the person, but what the heck, he will do it again and insist on his decision.  So, why bother?

Let go and ease the pain... now, I can sleep well without the heavy load of making sure they are on God's track.  God is in control and takes care of His children.  His grace I pray would just be bountiful in their lives.